Warning!

The following rantings do not represent the views of the US Government or any Local/National Atheist groups.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Tolerating Prayer

So I was at the Marine Corps Ball this weekend. I love the Marine Ball, it is always amazingly fun and in Albuquerque they have it at the Hard Rock Casino which makes it double badass. The Marine culture and ceremonies really put me in my insignificant little fucking place being just a paper pusher in the Navy. These guys are all over the world bleeding and dying (these two things are their job) and I truly see them all as selfless heroes.

All that being said...why the literal FUCK does some crazy old man who talks to the air have to give a 15 minute condescending, douche' baggey, we all lub Jebus prayer!?

To be honest the prayer actually started off very nice and he touched some solidly heartfelt topics about brothers in arms and morning the dead and things EVERYONE in the room agrees on. But then he got to the part about how we are all in the service because God called us and it is his guiding arm that blah blah and the Holy Spirit makes everyone blah blah and we are nothing without Jevus blah blah fucking gag me blah. Seriously, I have had enough of this zombie like talkie talkie bullshit about make believe things that aren't remotely fucking true or remotely fucking relevant to what we are there to celebrate.

No, I didn't walk out of the room; no I didn't make a scene. I stood there, I was quiet and listened to that prick remind why I fucking hate religion so much. He made me feel like less of a person. He made sure to point out we are a superior people because our country is mostly Chriatian (so being an atheist I am not contributing to our greatness?). He made me feel like an outcast because I am not a Christian groupie trying to score with the good lord when he comes through town (yea, and by score I mean fuck, I hope that sounds insulting because it was meant to be).

Seriously, how much longer will we keep pretending to rest our collective hopes on some made up desert nomad torturer sky daddy?

"You mad bro? Just walk out next time and quit bitching; there is nothing you can do about it."
No and fuck that. I shouldn't have to leave the room. I shouldn't have to cover my ears. What if they invited a Klansman to give a speech and he talked about how putting our trust in white power is the only way to keep our country and military strong? Would the African Americans just be expected to leave the room if they don't like it? No, because as a society we have come to a point where most of us realize that it is irrelevant prejudicial bullshit.

So how come when a preacher says putting our trust in Gerd is the only way to keep our country and military strong we can't acknowledge, as a society, the other irrelevant prejudicial bullshit that is being spewed?

To all the other selfish preachers out there..get bent.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Boy Scouts...you are still doing it wrong.

Made this today at lunch.
No matter how pretty you try package it bigotry is still bigotry.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

My letter to Republicans since they got handed their asses.

Letter to a Republican Nation,

 We are women, the poor, the jobless, racial minorities, atheists, gays, and people who care more about taking care of others than lowering taxes. Our numbers are increasing, our voices are getting louder and like it or not our votes actually count and we will continue to vote in record numbers. We are not going away and you have to deal with us. The Democratic Party has welcomed us with open arms and has actively been finding common ground with the things we find important. Things more important than your oil prices, your wars, your Christianity, your “traditions”, your economic policies and your hideous ideals of manifest destiny you seem to think still apply to the world today. If you can’t drop your archaic beliefs that oppress and divide then you will never win another presidency and rightfully so. Drop your bibles and pick up a shovel…we have work to do in our country and you are NOT helping.

Monday, September 17, 2012

BeaumontTexas


So this story came out about Beaumont Texas:
http:/  /www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2012/09/14/principal-shuts-down-cosmetology-class-because-one-of-the-students-looked-gay/

Then browsing reddit I find out that the entire town is shite:

Beaumont, TX. Ah yes. Who would have guessed this existed there. A brief intro the armpit of Texas. More backwoods Louisiana than it shares with the rest of the Lone Star state.
Flanked by the KKK capital Vidor, TX and site of dragging death of James Byrd, Jr, Jasper, Beaumont likes to think of itself as "the city" surrounded by all these silly Rednecks. It's a delusion.
Beaumont is shit. BISD is the shittiest school district you can imagine. It's full of corruption, racism, and bribery.

Examples:

*                               Highest paid superintendent in the state of Texas? BISD: http://www.texasbudgetsource.com/blog/thomas-likely-will-retire-highest-paid-superintendent-texas More than Houston, Dallas, or Austin -- a guy in a city of 110,000 that destroyed school after school and is the epitome of "teaching to the test". Tax dodger and still makes $340,000 a year.

*                               Contractors steal money and take bribes from the school district??? Keep your job!!http://www.kfdm.com/shared/news/top-stories/stories/kfdm_vid_1613.shtml

*                               Employees and students together in a secret sex club to fuck young girls?? BISD!http://www.military-quotes.com/forum/investigators-looking-into-secret-sex-t23925.html

*                               But they still hadn't learned years later when a couple of students sexually assaulted a freshman, videotaped, and then passed it around school. Good culture at that school. http://www.beaumontenterprise.com/news/article/Two-Ozen-football-players-indicted-for-child-3862495.php

*                               Administration is drunk driving school vehicles and gets pulled over without a license?? No big deal, call the SCHOOL POLICE DEPARTMENT and they'll give him a ride home without a ticket or arrest. No investigation until the public uproar and then he keeps his job!http://www.cbs19.tv/story/13204102/bisd-issues-statement-since-guillory-dash-cam-video-released?redirected=true

*                               What as the man above drunk driving when stopped??! One of the district's $50,000 leather interior, sunroof, King Ranch trucks bought with grant money that was supposed to help the school district buy ENVIRONMENTALLY FRIENDLY vehicles. These get 15mpg and are obvious waste. http://www.beaumontenterprise.com/news/article/BISD-truck-has-fancy-package-gets-14-17-mpg-701811.php

*                               Let's not forget the county purchasing agent who resigned after using the county equipment and funds to print all of her private business materials ( http://setxhomepage.com/fulltext?nxd_id=9891 ) who was then quickly hired by the school district ( http://blog.beaumontenterprise.com/bayou/2008/07/29/bisd-revisited-some-more-info-comes-to-light-on-the-bisd-hiring-controversy/ ) -- personally vouched for by the Superintendent as "over-qualified" for the position. And what do you know, she was the purchasing agent writing the checks and clearing the orders for all the work that was never done by the aforementioned corrupt contractor (http://beaumontenterprise.mycapture.com/mycapture/folder.asp?event=1375261&CategoryID=65676&ListSubAlbums=0 )

Fuck BISD. Fuck Beaumont. Fuck this principal . But this is no surprise at all.

 

Via this fine gent : http://www.reddit.com/user/beaumonttxsucks

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Analogy for my Atheism

My Poster - by Vikingmattress

It seems like when I was born my parents put a poster over the only window in my room. The poster depicted the outside world and as a child it was ok. It's what I've always known so I like the poster and I don't worrying about what's behind it. As I grow older I barely notice it anymore because it has become so commonplace but my parents still like to tell me how important the poster is. As I get older the poster seems a bit childish and, from what I understand of what's really going on, it's almost completely wrong and outlandish. When I ask my parents about the poster they tell me not to worry about it, just trust that the poster tells you everything you need to know. I don't like the poster anymore because I'm fairly convinced its total bullshit so I finally glance around it. What I see is so magnificent that I slowly peal the poster back absent mindedly. The poster lays on the ground now and I look through the window at everything soaking it all in like a lustful sponge. Through my window the universe is at my fingertips and completely outside of my grasp at the same time. Now everytime my parents come over I have to put that damn poster back up. But all I really want is to show them the window.

Neophyte care package

A "Neophyte care package" I found on reddit (user: Dudesan).  Use these resources to help someone who is questioning and wants good starting places for the questions they have.

Some resources regarding the bible:
The entire KJV is indexed and cross-linked, line by line. Deuterocanonical books are also included (along with the Quran and the Book of Mormon). If you only ever go to one counterapologetic site, make it this one.
http://skepticsannotatedbible.com/
List and analysis of biblical contradictions:
http://errancy.org/
Lists and analyses of atrocities commanded, committed, and condoned by the god of the Bible:
http://www.infidels.org/library/modern/donald_morgan/atrocity.html
http://www.evilbible.com/
Comprehensive counterapologetics wiki, including common arguments for and against the existence of god, and common refutations (and attempted refutations) of those arguments:
http://wiki.ironchariots.org/index.php?title=Main_Page
Fifty or so thought experiments demonstrating that most Christian beliefs are absurd.
http://godisimaginary.com/index.htm
Just about every commonly made creationist claim, and several well-cited refutations:
http://www.talkorigins.org/indexcc/list.html
Most of these are addressed in the FAQ, of course, but no one ever actually reads the FAQ, so I may as well repost them in a simpler and more organized form.  Said FAQ:
http://www.reddit.com/r/atheism/faq

Videos:
Why I am No Longer a Christian, Evid3nc3.
This is a very even handed, well put together, and well-researched story of one man's journey from born-again christian to naturalist. It's very emotionally moving, and I'd recommend watching it. It totals about two hours and change in length. His story is very similar to mine, but as I don't have beautiful music or illustrations, I just point people at his videos.
Specifically, I'd recommend this video and this one from the series, explaining where the modern conception of the Biblical God came from.
Dealing with Religion, Gods, Skepticism, and Epistemology
PhilHellenes
QualiaSoup and TheraminTrees
FishHeadSalad
Darkmatter2525
  • The Real God: An Epiphany [7:00] Describes the difference between rejecting an actual god, and rejecting a story.
  • Christian Justice [6:29] Explains why the doctrine of subsitutionary atonement is absurd and barbaric.
Miscellaneous
Dealing with Evolution/Creationism is specific:

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Nuclear Fusion and Israel

Nuclear fusion: combining lighter elements together and creating a new heavier element in a process which releases amazing amounts of energy. 

Stars use this process to burn for billions and billions of years creating heavier and heavier elements until they explode in a beautiful brilliant light. 

When the dust settles from a star’s death new solar systems and planets are made. 

Planets like ours with people like us made of the same atoms fused in the belly of the same star.  This awesomely powerful and wonderful process of fusion can be duplicated, by us, in a lab.  Sometimes we can be truly amazing creatures.

But when it comes to human rights…  Most of us are still fighting over which ignorant old book has the answers.


Seriously, fuck you Israel and Palestine and would you please stop fighting over a shitty piece of desert.

You say, God says

Monday, April 23, 2012

Wait, your church doctrine isn’t concerned about women’s rights? Well then it’s dumb and a morally corrupt pile of shit.

Oh man, check out this New York Times article.  The Cathogelicals are special pleading their case of religious discrimination.


“The nation’s Roman Catholic bishops issued a proclamation on Thursday calling for every priest, parish and layperson to participate in “great national campaign” to defend religious liberty, which they said is “under attack, both at home and abroad.” “

Cool story bro…but what does that mean “under attack”?

““To be Catholic and American should mean not having to choose one over the other,” said the statement, issued by the bishops ad hoc committee on religious freedom.“

You mean like how being Islamic and American should not mean having to choose one over the other?  Sati’s burn living widows on top of their dead husband’s funeral pile, should they have to choose?  Should polygamist Mormons chose?  If choosing to be Catholic means practicing bigotry and breaking discrimination laws then I don’t give a shit about protecting those stupid ignorant religious “freedoms” and neither does the law.

“This ought not to be a partisan issue,”

I know…It is an issue about the Cathy’s not being special anymore…*tear*

“In the document, the bishops seek to explain that their alarm is not only about the mandate in the health reform act that requires even Catholic colleges and hospitals to have insurance plans that cover birth control. “

OH NO!  God forbid females have control over their own health, hormones and when they have babies!  OH THE HUMANITY!  Wait, your church doctrine isn’t concerned about women’s rights, well then it’s dumb and morally corrupt.

“violations of religious freedom, including immigration laws in several states that they say make it illegal to minister to illegal immigrants. “

I find myself not caring one lick about this…*tear*

“They also assert that the government has violated the religious freedom of Catholics by cutting off contracts to Catholic agencies. Several states have denied financing to Catholic agencies that refused to place foster children with gay parents.”

Oh yea that makes since, kind of like when Muslim agencies refuse to give babies to Catholics.  I mean, it is thier religious freedom right?  You seriously have to be a fucking idiot to think that this is a valid argument.

“And the federal government refused to reauthorize a grant to a Catholic immigration organization that served victims of sex trafficking because as a Catholic group, it would not provide or refer women to services for abortion and birth control. “

Same as above.  When you treat women like cattle (even while performing a great service) it is fucking wrong.  The last thing a rescued sex traffic victim needs to be told, is that even though the Columbian drug cartel no longer has a say over her womanhood, some crazy fucking asshole who claims to talk to God sitting in a golden chair in Rome does.  Seriously, fuck these people.

“Quoting from the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s “Letter from a Birmingham Jail,” the bishops say that unjust laws should be either changed or resisted. In this passage, the bishops seem to refer to the recent attempt by President Obama to accommodate their objection to the health care mandate, by ordering the insurance companies, and not the Catholic institutions, to pay for birth control coverage.

“In the face of an unjust law,” the bishops wrote, “an accommodation is not to be sought, especially by resorting to equivocal words and deceptive practices. If we face today the prospect of unjust laws, then Catholics in America, in solidarity with our fellow citizens, must have the courage not to obey them.” “

Oh how cute, you are quoting MLK…your argument is still invalid.  As far as disobeying the law goes…good luck with that.  You’ll have to answer to our secular courts.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

If It's Life Then Let It Live!

PZ never disappoints and this is the greatest pro-choice blog post ever.  I am going to archive its ass here.
http://freethoughtblogs.com/pharyngula/2012/04/03/irrational-humans/


“The argument is never about whether some state is alive or not. Your appendix and tonsils are great masses of living cells, but if the organ becomes inflamed, doctors will cut them out and throw them away. Every time you poop, about a third of that mass that you excrete and flush away consists of living bacterial cells, yet no one hesitates and feels regret at the tragic loss of life when their hand is on the handle.
The argument is about whether that living thing is a person requiring extensive legal and moral protection, and it’s entirely clear that “life” is not a sufficient criterion, or people would be lobbying for the protection of turds and tonsils. We are not absolutists about protecting all life; we can’t be.”

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

A game of Catholic tug o war gone bad…


Some sick religious fucks pulled a girl’s intestines out through her vagina...by hand.

“It was a horrific, brutal death. After the intestines were removed, they allegedly waited for her to wake up and be free of the demon. They claimed that by removing the intestines she would be cured.”
Fuck faith and fuck belief in demons.
http://www.iol.co.za/news/crime-courts/girl-dies-after-exorcism-attempt-1.1257392

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Atheists! Why don't you just go around killing people?!


Christians who ask this are telling more about themselves than asking us a real question.

Saying you need to believe in God in order to be a good person does not prove he exists, or that I need to believe in him.  It just proves that you are a terrible person.

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Remember Harold Camping?

"'We humbly recognize that God may not tell his people the date when Christ will return,'

Oh really!  80+ years of bible study and you finally come to that conclusion!  What an old bag of fuck.  How about you pay back all those families you ruined and people stole money from?

http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2012/03/09/148323322/doomsday-prophet-camping-says-predictions-were-incorrect-and-sinful

Monday, March 5, 2012

We May as Well Let People Marry Dogs!

Other dangers exist. If marriage can be redefined so that it no longer means a man and a woman but two men or two women, why stop there? Why not allow three men or a woman and two men to constitute a marriage, if they pledge their fidelity to one another? It’s Madness!"
- The Average Priest in the 2000’s

Other dangers exist. If voting privileges can be redefined so that a black man vote equals a white man vote, why stop there? Why not allow a woman vote to equal a man’s? It’s Madness!"
-The Average Opinion in the 1800’s

Same reasoning, same ignorance, different bigotry.


Marriage is a life long promise/commitment between consenting adults to take care of each other.  We should not care about how many or what sex.  Consenting is the key word there.  That is a great starting point when defining laws like this.  This stupid argument about people eventually marrying dogs, cats or children stops dead in its tracks when you point out the part about all parties involved consenting in the process.  Polygamy however...well I know most people have a problem with it.  But why?  I've never heard a universally moral argument against it.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

He's a Witch! Drown Him!

A man and woman who tortured and killed a 15-year-old boy because they believed he was a witch have been found guilty of murder.





That Just Happened!

Ummm…GOD DAMNIT!  Are you Fucking serious?

It’s 2012.  If you believe in witchcraft then you are a fucking loon.  You are just as much of an ignorant human being as these killers… They just had the guts to follow through with Exodus 22:18.  Thank “God” most Christians are bible verse cherry pickers when it comes to what they follow.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Website Overhaul

You might have noticed some changes over the past day and a half.

The direction, tone and look didn't seem to fit right together.  I felt the Blog needed a facelift to really throw feelings of WTF at readers.  RAGE ON MY FELLOW ANGRIES!

Women, children, property and the things you can buy at Target

Looks like a ton of innocent women and children are about to start dying...because their owners (men) are fighting over what is going to happen to their women and children when they die.

http://www.npr.org/2012/02/25/147370689/in-egypt-christian-muslim-tension-is-on-the-rise

Allah forbid your property doesn’t make it to heaven with you so they can’t watch you bang a bunch of virgins all day.

HEY! For anyone who thinks it is okay to act out violence in the name of a God.



I bought that for you at target.  It was on sale.

Monday, February 27, 2012

Things That Need Some Answering

Bible verses...there are good ones, moderately confusing ones, bad ones and some WTFOMFG I can't believe someone put this on paper and thought it was kosher (heh, I crack myself up).

While browsing around reddit I found this handy little list of questionable Bible verses.

http://www.reddit.com/r/atheism/comments/q863w/some_bible_verses_to_use_as_comebacks_in_arguments/

1 Corinthians 11:14 (Men should not have long hair)
1 Corinthians 14:34-35 (Women should remain silent in church)
Deuteronomy 13:6-16 (Death penalty for Apostasy)
Deuteronomy 20:10-14 (Attack city, kill all men, keep women, children as spoils of war)
Deuteronomy 21:18-21 (Death penalty for a rebellious son)
Deuteronomy 22:19-25 (Kill non-virgin/kill adulterers/rapists)
Deuteronomy 22:28-29 (Pay virgin’s parents for raping her)
Ecclesiastes 1:18 (Knowledge is bad)
Exodus 21:1-7 (Rules for buying slaves)
Exodus 35:2 (Death for working on the Sabbath)
Ezekiel 9:5-6 (Murder women/children)
Ezekiel 23:19-20 (A whore who had sex with men hung like donkeys)
Galatians 5:2-4 (If you are circumcised, Christ has nothing for you)
Genesis 1:3,4,5,11,12,16 (God creates light, night and day, plants grow, before creating sun)
Genesis 3:16 (Man shall rule over woman)
Jeremiah 19:9 (Cannibalism)
John 3:18 (He who believes in Jesus is saved, he that doesn’t is condemned)
John 5:46-47 (Jesus references Old Testament)
1 Kings 7:23 (Pi equals 3)
Leviticus 3:1-17 (Procedure for animal sacrifice)
Leviticus 19:19 (No mixed fabrics in clothing)
Leviticus 19:27 (Don’t trim hair or beard)
Leviticus 19:28 (No tattoos)
Leviticus 20:9 (Death for cursing father or mother)
Leviticus 20:10 (Death for adultery)
Leviticus 20:13 (Death for gay men)
Leviticus 20:15 (Death for bestiality)
Leviticus 20:18 (No sex with a woman on her period)
Leviticus 21:17-23 (Ugly people, lame, dwarfs, not welcome on altar)
Leviticus 25:45 (Strangers can be bought as slaves)
Luke 12:33 (Sell your possessions, and give to the poor)
Luke 14:26 (You must hate your family and yourself to follow Jesus)
Mark 10:11-12 (Leaving your spouse for another is adultery)
Mark 10:25-25 (Next to impossible for rich to get into heaven)
Mark 16:15-16 (Those who hear the gospel and don’t believe go to hell)
Mark 20:21-22 (Sell your possessions and give to the poor)
Matthew 5:17-19 (Jesus says he has come to enforce the laws of the Old Testament)
Matthew 6:5-6 (Pray in secret)
Matthew 6:18 (Fast for Lent in secret)
Matthew 9:12 (The healthy don’t need a doctor, the sick do)
Matthew 10:34-37 (Jesus comes with sword, turns families against each other, those that love family more than him are not worthy)
Matthew 12:30 (If you’re not with Jesus, you’re against him)
Matthew 15:4 (Death for not honouring your father and mother)
Matthew 22:29 (Jesus references Old Testament)
Matthew 24:37 (Jesus references Old Testament)
Numbers 14:18 (Following generations blamed for the sins of previous ones)
Psalms 137:9 (Violence against children)
Revelation 6:13 (The stars fell to earth like figs)
Revelation 21:8 (Unbelievers, among others, go to hell)
1 Timothy 2:11-12 (Women subordinate and must remain silent)
1 Timothy 5:8 (If you don’t provide for your family, you are an infidel)
Zechariah 14:2 (Women ravished when city is taken in battle)

 From now on when someone askes me about coming back to Christianity I will simply copy/paste this list and inform them they need to answer for each verses stupidity and in what context they are ever morally right.  If completed to my satisfaction then we can talk.

Friday, February 24, 2012

Unshakable Faith

So, a senior high school student and newspaper editor for her school had an article rejected because it talked about her atheism and how she feels discriminated against on a daily basis. Apparently the schools excuse was that the article may cause a “disruption”.
http://www.knoxnews.com/news/2012/feb/23/lenoir-city-high-school-wont-publish-atheist-on/

And here is her actual article:
http://freethoughtblogs.com/cuttlefish/2012/02/23/lenoir-city-hs-refuses-to-publish-atheist-student-editorial/

Now, I could agree it could cause a disruption and mainly for people who are ignorant as to what an atheist is or don’t even believe they exist…but so what? Maybe this type of article is a little out of the realm of normal high school newspaper topics… but so what? She is part of a wrongfully vilified minority who simply wants to tell her story (which takes incredible guts for a person her age in a setting like high school). What if it was an African American student wanting to express the hardships of being a “Negro”? I don’t think the disruption that could cause would be enough to make school officials put a stop to the article being published.

I once heard that a true Christian faith is unshakable and has nothing to fear from worldly attacks… well why the hell are Christians so afraid of another point of view? Oh yea! It’s because unshakable faith is bullshit. Santorum has my back on this issue:

"I understand why Barack Obama wants to send every kid to college, because of their indoctrination mills, absolutely … The indoctrination that is going on at the university level is a harm to our country."
He claimed that,"62 percent of kids who go into college with a faith commitment leave without it," but declined to cite a source for the figure. And he floated the idea of requiring universities that receive public funds have 'intellectual diversity' on campus.”

Well, I don’t know where he is getting his numbers, but obviously 62% is bullshit, if that was true there would be a ton less Xtians in America (one could only wish). But I extend a sincere thanks for trying to help me prove my point Santyface.

Burning Koran's for funsies

Yawn, and again we are reminded that you cannot reason with people who take the act of blasphemy seriously.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

My conversion to Atheism (WALL OF TEXT!!!)

Wow, it has been a while since I posted anything.  Just wasn't feeling it....eh, I was lazy.  Here is my conversion story...

I’m of the opinion that most people don’t really become who they are until their mid-twenties. By “who we are” I mean that point in time when you have taken in enough information and wisdom so that you can face any situation life throws at you. Be it work, family, politics, hard times, big life decisions. When these situations arise we should be able to know our decisions were based on sound judgment and reasoning and the truest possible understanding of the world around us as. Becoming an Atheist wasn’t just a choice I made near the end of finding myself, but paralleled the road I took. And it doesn’t start with me walking away from, but trying to get closer to God.


I grew up the son of a pastor who preached in in Stewartsville Missouri. He and my mother, who was just as devote as him, were separated after a domestic dispute and I moved to Oklahoma with her when I was like, 8 I think. My dad never returned to church again (for reasons he never told me) but runs a trucker ministry while being a driver for CFI.

While in Oklahoma I grew up in the Bartlesville/Dewey area and went to the First Baptist church in Dewey, attended bible study, and other church functions every week (I believe they still have an old photo of me in their nursery). I prayed often and earnestly. For the next 10 years my faith steadily increased, especially after I joined a non-denominational Church that had a worship band, down to earth preacher, people dancing around and singing in tongues, the whole nine yards. As a teenager I made trips with them to Toronto revivals to get closer to Jesus.

I felt the presence of God. Sometimes I would tingle and sweat with the Holy Spirit. Other times I felt led by Him to give money to a certain cause, or to pay someone a specific compliment. These things still happen but I attribute them to myself just being a good empathetic person.

Around age 18 when I went away to college I got depressed from guilt, probably because I downloaded music, and watched a lot of internet porn. During this time I also met many different people from many different religions. Growing up in the Dewey area I was never confronted with someone who wasn’t a Christian (except for the Wiccan girl in middle school, who I still feel about making fun of to this day). Before my encounters with them I was of the opinion that if you were not a Christian then you were either evil, stupid, or just not right in the head. I mean, it was so obvious to me, all the evidence was there, and to believe in something else was crazy. First it was my roommate, Charlie; he was the first Atheist I ever met. Until this point I didn’t know it was even possible to “not” believe in God. I was taught that Atheists were just people who are angry at God. Charlie turned out to be relatively normal, just like me in fact and we had a great year being roommates. Then there were the two gentlemen I met in zoology, both Muslim but great study partners. It took nearly the entire semester before I got the gulls to ask why they believe in Allah. As I listened I instantly became aware that they believed for exactly the same reasons as me. Not only that, but they were taught about Jesus and the Christian bible while they were children to help strengthen their faith. I felt kind of cheated by my parents and my religion, why was I so hidden from other religions? I mean the truth of God has nothing to hide from, right? If it helps Muslims to learn about other faiths then it should work for me too and make me a better Christian. So I made it a point to sign up for a world religion course.

That holiday season my faith was truly shaken for the first time in my life. I was watching the history channel and they had a special on about the Jamestown massacre. At first I felt cheated again by my religion for being so sheltered. I mean this was an important part of Christian history, and could teach a valuable lesson about the terrible things that can happen if you can’t think for yourself. When they got to the interviews (of family of followers and followers themselves) I felt myself moving outside of my Christian box. I quickly realized that the people who killed their children and themselves were not crazy and not tricked by the devil. They seemed a lot like my mother, my aunt and other devoted people just like me. They clearly loved God just as much as I did. They prayed, probably more than I ever had. All these people wanted was what all religious people want. To live like God wants them too, right? Why would God let this happen? Why was there no intervention to stop them from feeding their children poison? He had plenty of opportunities seeing as how they spent most of their days praising him.
I tried to tell myself “his ways are above us”, but why? If we are involved wouldn’t that make much more sense for us to understand and thereby stopping atrocities like this that have no Good come from them at all, atrocities so bad, that I thought I had just figured out why this was never taught to me. These thoughts of questioning God were scaring me and made myself stop them and decided that I needed extra help. While continuing to attend church and pray on the matter I purchased an apologetics book my friend prescribed called the Divine Conspiracy to help strengthen my faith. I only made it half way through the book when I decided that it wasn’t giving the answers I needed, while beautifully written, I just didn’t feel satisfied. So if it wasn’t my faith I was trying to fix then what was it? Maybe faith wasn’t good enough for me? This thought also scared me; I realize now it was only because I didn’t understand what I really meant by “faith” at that time.

When my world religions class started I had been praying about my situation and hoping God would give me something that would pull me the direction I needed to go. It was in this class I found my new passion. I loved learning about why people believe what they believe. I soon found myself immersed in the writings of the Mahabharata, Siddhartha Gautama, Joseph Smith and the Koran. When we made it to Christianity I was reminded of my faith problems. Not at anything we learned. It was all basic with just a few things I didn’t know. But wanting to learn more of my own faith I decided to make my way to the religion section in Barns and Nobel. Immediately my eyes found a book called A History of God: The 4,000-year Quest of Judiasm, Christianity and Islam by Karen Armstrong. Without even reading it I knew this was what I was looking for, it would help me understand why my religion is the way it is and hopefully restore some faith. I thanked God for making my search so effortless and went on my way.

The book was amazing. It was a complete dissection of all three religions and where they came from. Starting with pagan/multi God roots and working its way up to monotheism. Yes, when Judaism came to power they were trying to join together all the Gods into one. The original Old Testament Hebrew texts or, the Torah, document this well. In the early parts of the Old Testament the word God is spelled “אלים” the “ים” at the end makes it plural. The more I studied the more I realized that everything I was taught in Sunday school was wrong, Genesis was now completely bunk to me. Humans didn’t always worship Yahweh, there was thousands upon thousands of years where we worshiped whatever the heck we wanted to trees, the sun, or other people and the Christian really didn’t come along until much longer after. So if Genesis was true then all of our ancestors for thousands of years went straight to hell because God didn’t make an appearance until 6 thousands years ago. This led me to a logical conclusion, Genesis, Eve, the apple and the magic snake all had to be true in order for the fall of man to happen. If the fall of man doesn’t happen then Jesus doesn’t need to be crucified. If all of these things are unnecessary then why bother believing in them. At this point I was well out of my Christian box and these thoughts no longer scared me anymore. I was only driven for more knowledge. My pursuit for which religion was most true started with Buddhism. Although a beautiful philosophy and a agreat way to make yourself a better person when I came to the spiritual aspects I just couldn’t believe them with a straight face. This made me realize that it wasn’t any of the spiritual parts of any religion that made me want to be a better person but he philosophies, so I turned to philosophy. After years of study, and watching debates I became an Agnostic. After a little while as an Agnostic I found a program called the Atheist Experience run by Matt Dillahunty. It was this man and his amazing skeptical and philosophical skills that gave the bravery to take that final step. Along with from Dawkins, Dennett and Hitchens I came to realize that there is nothing wrong with being an Atheist.
It certainly wasn’t one single fact, but hundreds and hundreds from studies of all religions. Basically, Christianity looks very much like just another religion invented by ancient, superstitious people. Its claims about the universe are numerously false – until they are reluctantly rewritten to keep up with science, which has only made God smaller, less active, and more hidden.

And I can no more chose to be an Atheist then you choose to be a Christian, or choose to love your wife. These are things that happen through our life experiences and feelings from reason and how we interpret the world around us. Even I woke up on day and decided that I would pick a religion because I am scared of going to hell it wouldn’t be an honest route to take; I wouldn’t be worshiping a God because I believe in him, only out of fear of death. For me to become a true Christian again it would have to be something that would turn me away from all the evidence I have seen and the experiences I’ve had over the past 10 or so years. God should know how to do that, and it isn’t impossible because it worked going one way, why not the other?